16 Comments
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Arch's avatar

I got invested in John. Feel like there is more . Is there a part 2 ? eagerly waiting for part 2…..

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Factorial Zero's avatar

There might be, based on the response this is getting

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Charles Mitchell's avatar

Lol what did I just read? That's hilarious. Do it again! (Or whatever it is you want to do, be encouraged!)

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Haha thanks, Charles

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J H Smith's avatar

I was asleep, and this story woke me up.

Still comatose though, sadly.

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Good morning!! Much appreciated 🙂

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Marlene Jo's avatar

This is… kind of captivating? Not sure if it’s the low bar or it’s good. That said I once wrote what I tried to make “my worst story ever” and my friends all found it fun and endearing (it was about a guy who befriends a bitter resentful frog who keeps asking for drug money)

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Hey Marlene, you’re too kind haha. Is the drug money frog story available somewhere? I’d love to read it

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Marlene Jo's avatar

Hahaha sadly no I'm not as courageous as you.

Btw in yours I really loved the style of this (except I don't get the Sweden part - maybe cuz it makes no sense): "John had no familial connections to Sweden. That being said, our story really begins 24 years prior. After being dropped by his mom’s OBGYN, John was recognized as a savante in science but had terrible test taking abilities. He was held back for 8 years in various grades. Now you know. Back to the future." Something about the maximalist ridiculousness reminds me of Salman Rushdie's voice in Midnight's Children. E.g. he tells a story about a girl who was constantly sick and her father was so conservative he covered his daughter in a white sheet with a hole cut out whenever the doctor went to see her, then the doctor over time when he finally sees her face falls in love with her, they get married and she becomes the bitter matriarch of their family and so forth - just a crazy turn of events that is committed to enough that it seems to make sense, lol. Also he has a very "TV/movie jump cut" style of narrating

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Factorial Zero's avatar

I appreciate that! Yeah, the Sweden part is just for absurdity.

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Michael Edward's avatar

“American football (Alabama tennis).” Hahaha gold.

I did wonder what you was doing with this piece, like was you going to call out someone else’s story. Very well played :)

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Experimental sentences

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Vancouver's avatar

A sequel is warranted, what is John doing these days ?

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Factorial Zero's avatar

I’ll have to give it a think

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David Perlmutter's avatar

It's far from the worst fiction on Substack.

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Factorial Zero's avatar

David, thanks lol

I might’ve not turned the absurdity dial enough

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