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Stripper's avatar

God bless you. It is nice to see someone just having fun with life. Same reason all my Notes on Substack are just me being a shithead and save the more serious stuff for Posts. I enjoyed your list.

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Lori K's avatar

And another one: People who say, “I’m grateful for EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU”.

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Yeah this one’s irksome

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Lori K's avatar

I might have a problem… I have too many pet peeves. There, I admitted it. Thanks for listening and I’ll try to refrain from adding more to your list. Lol

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Keep adding! That’s why I wrote this haha

Next article is going to be about things that are awesome

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Lori K's avatar

I have even more of those 🙌 😁

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Perfect hahaha

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Lori K's avatar

My list of the pet peeves might be too much for a response here. Maybe I need to create my own post with them. Nah, it’s already been done. Lol

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Factorial Zero's avatar

You should make one

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Lori K's avatar

If I do, I’ll be sure to credit you. Oh and btw, I love your short posts. I have a short attention span so these are great. Also like it when people use the vo so I can multi task. 🙌

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Looking forward to it! Thanks, I appreciate that! I’ve been surprised by the feedback on short posts. I thought people preferred long essay style things but people also enjoy shorter length stuff so that’s been cool to learn. Thank you for the feedback 🙂

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Robert Sturgeon's avatar

This is a good one Lori

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Lori K's avatar

Thank you, Robert.

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Michael Edward's avatar

So many good ones.

But this ones my favourite:

“Men who unbutton dress shirts too far down.” — that’s gold.

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Many-a-hairy chest have been witnessed over the years

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Michael Edward's avatar

Hahaha indeed.

Have you ever submitted any of your writing to any publications Factorial Zero?

I’ve recently been submitting some of my funnier stuff to a few places — so far all I’ve received is rejections or silence — but I submitted to this funny online publication recently called ‘Point in Case’ and I feel like your style of writing would suit them.

Just a thought. . . :)

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Factorial Zero's avatar

It’s something I’ve had in the back of my mind but I haven’t pursued it. I’ll check it out! Thanks for the recommendation! I’ll dig through the archives and see if I have anything that might fit haha

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Michael Edward's avatar

Yeah, I felt the same way for ages. I just had a few people nudge me to try and so I did.

Good luck :)

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Factorial Zero's avatar

I’ll let you know if anything happens!

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Amos's avatar

People into golf

Anyone who references "kindness" (mainly because it's a code word for "I will destroy you if you do anything I don't like")

96% of all mainstream 90's rock.

Adult men who walk around in basketball shorts.

Extremely specific: Cyclists who ride on MacArthur Blvd between Glen Echo, MD and the DC line. I dont mind cyclists. I've done many a bike race myself. But these folks deserve to die.

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Factorial Zero's avatar

LOL thanks for the additions

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Charles Mitchell's avatar

"People who drink water out of milk jugs at the gym" I don't know why, but that is so funny. Lol "get a Stanley cup, you trash panda!"

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Factorial Zero's avatar

There’s something about milk jug water drinking that drives me up the wall

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Colin Sullivan's avatar

What about milk out of the milk jar ?

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Colin Sullivan's avatar

Microwave fish guy is also the guy who drinks water from a milk jug ?

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Different people. Milk jug guy is a vague mirage of a person I can visualize in my head. Microwave fish guy is someone I’ve encountered but I don’t know their name

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Vancouver's avatar

Trash Panda …LOL

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Sudana Krasniqi's avatar

HOW IS JERRY SEINFELD WORTH BILLIONS? MAKE IT MAKE SENSE

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Factorial Zero's avatar

I’ve watched him live once. His stand-up was good. The thing that really made me stop liking him was the opening to one of his stand-up specials. He was telling the audience how he has so much money that he doesn’t need to perform anymore but he decided to do it anyway for them. I might be paraphrasing slightly, but that was the essence of it. Like, it’s literally true...everyone in the audience knows that. He doesn’t need to work ever again, but it just seemed in such bad taste.

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Sudana Krasniqi's avatar

I think he’s not that funny to be getting away with being unpleasant and over all not a genuinely nice person. Chapelle, David, Burr I give a pass to.

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Yeah, well said. Imagine how unpleasant he might be off camera if he’s like that when he’s being filmed.

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Maps's avatar

Haha I am several of these things, but don’t worry! I’m paying a lot of taxes!

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Factorial Zero's avatar

I’m a lot of them too hahaha

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Vancouver's avatar

How about people grunting at the gym when they lift anything heavier than a toddler ?

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Factorial Zero's avatar

That’s acceptable in moderation

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Vancouver's avatar

How about people heading to yoga studio with their mats strapped around their shoulders like a Viking sword at 9:00am on a weekday ?

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Yoga WARRIORS

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Lori K's avatar

People who don’t know about the drivers unspoken zipper policy.

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Factorial Zero's avatar

What is the zipper policy??

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Lori K's avatar

Not knowing you well, I’m not sure if you’re joking. But, zipper merging allows cars to merge alternately between the vehicles that are all headed toward the same direction. Like coming out of a busy parking lot or entering a highway.

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Oh gotcha. I wasn’t joking haha. I haven’t heard it be called that before 🙂

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Lori K's avatar

I might have made up the name, it’s what I’ve always called it. Not sure where I heard it from though.

But, do you abide by it?

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Yeah I think I do? If someone’s merging in I’ll give space if I can

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Lori K's avatar

Now you can repeat it to yourself or others… zipper merging people!!! lol

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Colin Sullivan's avatar

microwaves fish? huh? I hope to never encounter such activity. phew.

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Nothing prepared me for the first time I experienced it

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Colin Sullivan's avatar

this person does it all the time? this person deserves a short story.

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Ika Wright's avatar

I am some of those lol. I have already been taxed to death back in Denmark, no more please... 🙏☠️

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Don’t worry, Ika. A lot of these apply to me too 😅

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Ika Wright's avatar

Haha. Great, now we will both be more taxed to the grave.

Also, I am weak against puppies and maybe only ever had android phones 🙂

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The Chaos Trials's avatar

Love this!!

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Factorial Zero's avatar

Thank you!

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May 10, 2024
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Factorial Zero's avatar

We both know the type haha

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May 7, 2024
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Factorial Zero's avatar

Like I always say, the thing holding the world back is the lack of investment bankers

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Robert Sturgeon's avatar

🤣

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